Editor-in-Chief & Publisher: MIR JAVED RAHMAN


WHAT’S YOUR QUERY ?


Issue Date 15 - 21 July, 2017 at 2:00 PM

WHAT’S YOUR QUERY?
Q: Hi! I am a teenager and have recently finished college. I am a very ambitious person but my habit of overthinking keeps me away from success. For now I am looking to study further for a bachelor’s degree and have two options to consider in terms of the discipline I want to pursue. I would either study in the field of arts or engineering. I love drawing and it’s my passion. Though I feel that I am not good enough at it and for the longest time I haven’t drawn anything because of this very reason. My friends tell me how good I am at it but I just don’t believe them and never consider their appreciation genuinely. I love the field of arts and would do anything to make it big in the future as an artist but this negative attitude demotivates me all the time. Although my parents want me to pursue engineering but they’re supportive of me pursuing arts as well, as they want to see me doing what I love. My problem is that I am not confident enough about my potential as an artist and am confused as to what I should do to get rid of this feeling. Please help! Sadia
A:
Dear Sadia, the most effective recipe for success consists of perseverance and passion. Grit is what you need at the moment. You need to instil a strong drive within yourself to make your dreams come true, no matter how unachievable and tough they may seem. Overthinking is what keeps you away from moving towards your passion. Stop overthinking and start living in the moment. When you keep your mind busy in overanalysing situations, you end up thinking about the worst case scenarios and eventually give up on your aspirations. But the minute you keep your mind away from doing so, you will see how stress-free and easygoing you get with time. You are lucky to have friends and family who are both supporting and appreciative of your ambition. So cherish their existence and do what you love.

WHAT’S YOUR QUERY?
Q: I am a 31-year-old guy and have extreme anger issues. This problem has been the reason I lost several jobs and it also makes me a mystery within my family and friends. I have been like this since my teenage years, however, it wasn’t as bad as it has become now. I sometimes blame my father for my raging anger as he was really strict with me in my teenage years, my mother, on the other hand, was slightly lenient. Initially, they thought that I was just being my teenage self but my anger issues started to worsen as I proceeded towards my twenties. I don’t like the fact that my anger issues affect and stress my friends and family, which is why I would like you to help me get rid of it, as it is now taking a toll on my mental health. Thanks! Rizwan
A:
Dear Rizwan, you should seek help. Consider this as a genuinely serious advice. Even though a lot of young men of your age have anger issues which obviously affects their personal and professional lives really badly, but seeking help is not a bad option. Therefore, instead of making life miserable for yourself and your loved ones, it’s better for you to work towards improving your attitude. You are in your early thirties and can work on this problem if you have the will to do so. A counsellor will help you get to the root of the problem and that can only be done once you accept the fact that you need help. Seeking professional help is not anything to be ashamed of, as many people look towards professionals to solve issues of mental health. All the best!


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