I am a teenage girl and I am going through what adolescents usually go through, however I am strong emotionally, so things are a bit easier for me. I have a love/hate relationship with my parents, but I love my little brother. I have a good social life as well. I rarely cry, it only happens when someone really close hurts me. However, sometimes I start crying without any reason and it lasts for a long time and I can’t stop myself from crying. Could you please explain why does it happen?

Your problem that you have explained has contradictory elements which is not a bad thing, just something you need to be aware of. It’s okay to have various parts in us like feeling emotionally strong sometimes and also weak at times to the point of breaking down. Just be mindful of what makes you extremely sad at times and in control of your emotions at other times. Write down your feelings in journal to see how they surface at different times. Also be aware of what makes you love your parents and what makes you dislike them. Consult a therapist if you feel unable to process your emotions for a long time.

Lately, I am simply not able to deal with people much. I can’t get too close and I have become very withdrawn. Over the past seven years I have gone through a lot, and relationships of any kind just have not worked for me no matter how hard I’ve tried. I have always been a quiet person by nature, but I do talk especially if I feel I can relate to someone. But all my life people just don’t get me. I really don’t want to sound like a victim because I am not blaming anybody, but sometimes it’s hard to feel like you belong. God knows I’ve tried. Like I said, people have really been disrespectful and I have had to defend myself more than usual. Maybe because I’m getting older, I just can’t handle much anymore. I feel like something is wrong with me because I would rather not be bothered with anyone anymore and that’s not right. I’m so tired of faking it but I don’t know how to deal with all these flood of emotions? I have no fun, no peace just work, work and work.

It seems that you have been hurt by different relationships in the past and your past experiences are affecting how you relate to people now. You also feel wronged by different people. Your feelings are valid. Acknowledging your emotions is very important for your emotional health. Maybe you need to build a stronger relationship with yourself first before forming new relationships with others. Explore yourself as a person and start giving validation, respect and unconditional acceptance to yourself. Your inner relationship with yourself will give you ultimate peace and happiness, once it’s established. Write down what you love about yourself and own the things that you have done right in the past. Forgive yourself for the mistakes made by you. Indulge in healthy self talk daily for five minutes. You will start seeing changes in yourself soon.