Mrs. A WOMAN’S SILENT WAR AGAINST PATRIARCHY

By Muhammad Ayaz Sheikh

Is A Woman’s Existence Limited To The Kitchen?
The Bollywood film Mrs. is an engaging and reality-based story that highlights the unseen labor and societal expectations imposed on housewives. A remake of the Malayalam film The Great Indian Kitchen, it tells the story of a woman who, despite being the wife of a gynecologist, spends every single day cooking, cleaning, and taking care of others.

She does not face direct oppression, yet her dreams and desires are gradually eroded by constant criticism and pressure, forcing her to conform to so-called societal norms. The film is particularly impactful because it does not depict an extraordinary injustice but instead portrays the everyday struggles of countless women whose issues are generally overlooked.

The true success of this film lies in its ability to present an ordinary yet powerful narrative, using seemingly mundane household chores to shed light on the silent suffering of women.

The film Mrs. intricately portrays the patriarchal system and the exploitation of women embedded in society. Director Arati Kadav has adapted this story for Hindi cinema with a few modifications, the most notable being that the husband is depicted as a gynecologist. This change initially gives the impression that he might be more understanding of his wife's emotions. However, in reality, he remains emotionally and psychologically indifferent to her struggles.

The story revolves around Richa (Sanya Malhotra), who enters her husband Diwakar’s (Nishant Dahiya) home after marriage, filled with hopes and dreams. However, she soon realizes that her emotions, desires, and preferences hold no value in this household.

Her father-in-law, Ashwin Kumar (Kanwaljit Singh), much like his son, believes that a woman's primary role is to stay confined within the home. To him, a woman’s greatest achievement is serving her husband and in-laws. He proudly cites his wife as an example, boasting that she was a PhD holder but gave up her career for the sake of her family and children.

When Richa expresses her aspirations, she is dismissed as if her dreams are insignificant. The film doesn’t just highlight male dominance; it also sheds light on how women themselves contribute to reinforcing patriarchy.

Richa’s mother-in-law, aunt, and even her own mother constantly advise her to compromise and sacrifice her emotions. One of the most thought-provoking moments occurs when Richa complains to her mother, only to be met with the response: “You left your home over something so trivial?” This reaction underscores how many women have internalized patriarchal values, discouraging change and passing on the same lessons of patience and endurance to their daughters that they were once taught.

Sanaya Malhotra delivers a stellar performance in Mrs. Her character initially sees life through a lens of happiness, but gradually, she begins to grasp the bitter realities surrounding her. The film masterfully captures her emotional transformation – from the joy of early marriage to disillusionment, helplessness, and eventual anger – making her journey deeply relatable for the audience.

Nishant Dahiya, playing the husband, also excels in his role. At first, he appears to be a progressive, educated man, but as the story unfolds, his deep-seated patriarchal mindset comes to light. Similarly, Kanwaljit Singh convincingly portrays a father who firmly believes that a woman’s primary duty is household service.

The film cleverly incorporates symbolic elements that compel viewers to reflect. The kitchen, in particular, is used as a powerful metaphor. Richa repeatedly asks Diwakar to fix the leaking sink, but he ignores her concerns. When her in-laws notice the problem, instead of addressing it, they blame her. This scene symbolizes how women’s struggles are trivialized and dismissed, often leading to emotional breakdowns.

Another key moment in the film occurs when, in the early days of marriage, Diwakar affectionately tells Richa, “You smell like the kitchen, and that’s the most beautiful scent.” However, as time passes, the same words take on a sarcastic and disdainful tone: “You always reek of the kitchen.” This shift powerfully highlights how women’s efforts and sacrifices are undervalued over time.

Ultimately, Mrs. serves as a mirror to society, exposing deep-rooted gender biases. While the protagonist doesn’t face overt violence, she is trapped in a system that constantly reminds her that her primary role is to manage the household. The film’s cinematography effectively captures the monotony and exhaustion of domestic work, making the audience feel its weight.

The most compelling aspect of Mrs. is its subtle yet powerful storytelling. The protagonist’s struggles are commonplace, making the narrative deeply relatable for women across different backgrounds. The film relies on simple and realistic dialogues, but its strength lies in its visual storytelling, effectively capturing the monotony and exhaustion of household labor.

Interestingly, the film has sparked controversy, particularly among certain male viewers, as evident from social media backlash. While Mrs. has initiated an important conversation, it has also faced resistance, especially from those who perceive it as an attack on traditional family structures. However, in reality, the film doesn’t oppose family values – it questions the rigid gender roles deeply embedded within them.

Since Mrs. reflects the realities of Indian women, it’s relevant to examine some statistics about household labor in India. According to the Time Use Survey (TUS), Indian women spend an average of 4.8 hours per day on unpaid domestic work and 2.3 hours on unpaid caregiving, totaling 7 hours daily. While women’s labor force participation in India increased to 37% in 2022-2023, experts argue that this rise is primarily driven by economic pressures rather than a progressive shift in gender roles.

However, Mrs. does not merely represent the women of India; rather, it serves as a voice for women in Pakistani society and across the world who sacrifice their dreams and endure psychological abuse from men. If they dare to speak out against it, they face immense pressure from all sides. While the core theme of Mrs. is rooted in the Indian social structure, its impact is equally relevant in Pakistan, where traditional social values still dictate the role of women.

Official statistics in Pakistan confirm that women perform significantly more unpaid domestic labor than men. Even though women’s participation in education and employment is increasing, they are still expected to manage household responsibilities.

Pakistani society also idealizes female sacrifice. A “good woman” is often perceived as one who sets aside her dreams and dedicates herself entirely to her family. This mindset compels women to deprive themselves of their basic rights, as societal pressure forces them to focus solely on household duties.

According to a United Nations report, women’s labor force participation in Pakistan is only 26%. However, this does not mean they are not working; rather, social barriers, family pressures, and the lack of supportive infrastructure prevent them from formally entering the workforce. Many women, especially from financially weaker backgrounds, take up jobs out of economic necessity, but they still have to manage household responsibilities alongside their professional duties, leading to constant stress and exhaustion.

Just as Mrs. faced criticism from certain circles in India, similar narratives in Pakistan are often dismissed as the promotion of Western ideologies. The reluctance of men to contribute to household work is not just about convenience; it is also about maintaining power dynamics.

The film Mrs. does not offer a definitive solution to these issues, but it does bring attention to an extremely important problem. Addressing these challenges in both India and Pakistan requires policy reforms to recognize and fairly distribute unpaid domestic work. A cultural shift is necessary to soften rigid gender roles, and the media must play a crucial role in promoting the equal division of household responsibilities.

Watching Mrs. leaves a heavy heart, but it also instills hope that women can make their own life choices and that they do not have to settle for unfair compromises. The film serves as a mirror for men who perceive themselves as civilized and progressive yet unconsciously exhibit patriarchal attitudes in their behavior. Mrs. is a thought-provoking film that raises significant questions about societal norms, and that is precisely what makes it a success.

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