The alarm rings and I snooze it. I don’t want to get out of bed just yet. It’s too cozy and warm. I pull the covers around my shoulders and huddle in just till the next snooze. It blares again at 6:15, snooze, then 6:30.

I rub my eyes and check my phone. I have notifications in all the social portals that I use and I’m a teenager so I use quite many. I begin to scroll and leave comments wherever I can. I don’t post a picture of “this is how I woke up”. I always think that these pictures are fake and filtered. On most days I don’t even look like I’m from this planet when I wake up. I don’t want my picture to end up as a meme!

Surfing the social pages relaxes me. Experts say that it isn’t a good way to start your morning. It demotivates us rather than motivate and prepare us for the day. They say that all these images make us feel critical of our own lives. We become lonely, brooding adults who can’t find happiness in the mundane anymore. But what does it matter. I’ll do it anyway. I’m making a real connection, aren’t I? There are people who care out there and they are also my friends.

I realise that I have to get up if I want to make it to university in time. I drag my feet out of the covers and onto the cold floor. It’s getting really chilly in Karachi this winter. Something we’re not used to. But we make the most of it by wearing all our favourite winter clothes and accessories. It isn’t every day that we get to wear these sweatshirts and hoodies. They come out so nicely in pictures.

I head to the kitchen to get some breakfast. No one is awake. Everyone has their own schedule and no one is really up at this hour. I make a quick bowl of cereal and coffee. But I really need to rush because the morning is pretty much slipping away. I gulp down the most important meal of the day in a breeze and start organising my bag and books and all. My clothes need to be ironed too. Everything is so last minute. In between I answer WhatsApp messages and texts. My friends are all up and everyone is buzzing about the day, the work, the projects and classes. I still haven’t had any real human interaction. I can hear some movement in my parents’ room but no one is out.

Clothes are laid and I can get my morning routine underway. A quick shower and dressing up and a light make-up today, I don’t have time for more. I hope my pictures come out nicely in this “go to” look. I order a cab and as I’m waiting for it I decide to head out, locking the doors. I’ll wait in the drive way and soak some sun. My phone is my forever companion. I take a few selfies for Snapchat and put in the day’s streak. I’m beginning to feel robotic about the whole morning but it can’t be helped. I vaguely realise that I haven’t had any real words spoken to or shared anything with any physical person yet. My cab driver will probably be the first person I speak to. Strange, but true.

I remind myself that I spoke to God because I prayed and I immediately feel a whole lot better. I miss my friends.

I make it to university just in time.

Class will begin at 8:30. I think I’ll just kill a few minutes in the cafeteria. I notice that practically everyone is on their cell phone. Huddled in groups and around the tables, so am I to be honest. I’m browsing through Instagram and Facebook and also answering my WhatsApp messages all the while keeping an eye on the time. That’s it I guess, time for class.

We’re not allowed to use our cell phones in class. We can use it to capture the slides or maybe record a lecture, or research if need be but not to surf the internet.

I find my friends sitting in the third row. We immediately begin to talk like crazy. Have we been deprived of social contact for too long? It’s all coming out in spurts of laughter and whispers. We’re generally happy but Amna looks really sad. I ask her what’s up and she tells me that she’ll talk to me later about it. The teacher needs to begin her lecture.

The same old slides and discussion. Taking down notes is such a bother. I note down all the references and the slides will be sent via email. Class over. As I move into the corridor, I can see that many of my classmates are using the sun to their advantage and are taking pictures for Snapchat or Instagram.

“I’m thinking of going to the library to study,” I tell my friends.

I still have to cram for a test next week and I know the weekend is going to be busy. There are guests coming over and I’ll have to socialise and help mom around the house. I don’t particularly look forward to anything but then again I have to behave as if I belong.

I decide to put my ear plugs in and listen to music while I study. It really helps me focus. Danish in the corner makes a gesture asking me to join him but I ignore him. I put my playlist on and lay out my books. Before I begin, I check all my notifications then get to work. I’ll get a lot done in this 90 min gap between classes.

After a good hour or so I feel like having a snack. From the looks of it I managed to revise about one third of the content and I can leave the rest for later. I’ll have lunch with my friends and then back to class.

As I move to the counter at the cafeteria the sounds around me make me feel warm and comfortable. Lots of laughter and chatting and lots of real conversations.

My friend takes my arm and pulls me away. She tells me we’ll go outside because it’s too noisy in here.

“Aren’t you deafened by it? Come! We’ll talk outside,” my friend says to me.

She had some “issues” to discuss. So, over my lunch I became a pseudo therapist and a friend with a huge attention span. I needed it. Several times in the rant I suggest that she should share all of this with her mom but she replies that her mom doesn’t “get” her at all and dad wouldn’t understand either. In fact, dad was emotionally absent anyway. He just paid the bills. Also, she says that they are so conservative that they’ll probably take her out of university if they found out. It was hard work keeping up with her tirade but at the end of it she felt better and I felt exhausted. All that human interaction was just too much.

One more class to attend and then its home time. I’ll sleep and wake up in the evening. Spend a few minutes with mom and then study. I won’t have to be in any human company till dinner time.

That suited me just fine. I’m never lonely I tell myself. I like to be alone.

Last class over and I head home. I could talk to the girl next to me in the van but I’m too tired and bored. I plug in my music and pretend I’m half asleep till I get home.

I think the researches got it all wrong. We’re happier like this. In our own bubble and having our own way. I scroll Facebook and my eye stops on an article.

“Teenage depression on the increase because young people don’t socialise and have no one to talk to,” I could read this and find it profoundly over exaggerated but I continue scrolling. Who cares!